ZZzzzzzzs Coming

I have no freakin’ idea why I am sitting here and not in the bed. I’ve been rubbing my eyes for a couple of hours now and even napped for a few minutes earlier. You know the kind – the head falling hitting the back of the chair and awaking quickly in a “where am I” stupor wondering why I’m indecently clad. I don’ t know why I’m so tired today. I guess with being on vacation last week and having to catch up at the office I’m just running myself ragged. Oh well – this too shall pass……hopefully in a sleep so sound I’ll think I’m Ms. RipVanwinkle when I wake. Ok. So I don’t want to be asleep THAT long but I definitely need some shut eye. And I hear ya already – I’m going to bed in a minute!!

Couple of tidbits for you:

• Named a new server today….kept the naming convention in line with our solar system scheme. It’s name you ask? Uranus. Yeah, I hope this server & software app doesn’t turn out to be a pain in the ass.
• I love my new template – but it killed me to take down my GAMECOCK one, especially since we beat Clemson last Saturday. Oh, have I told you that yet? We beat Clemson, 31-28! (I may gloat for a while, get comfortable.)
• Don’t you just love the countdown ticker up there marking the arrival of Christmas? Yeah, it’s a delicate reminder of how soon it will be here and how many shopping days are left. No pressure people! Get that shopping done!
• Some dude, who will remain nameless, CHUCK, sent me an email today with the subject line “Spurrier just signed a new contract”……………..I was confident in the split second I read it that Spurrier was NOT leaving USC but my heart somewhat stopped anyway…that is, until I opened the email to read the rest of the sentence – “with Cingular and is getting lots of extra minutes.” CHUCK, you are NOT funny! Don’t play with me and my Gamecocks!
• At the torture chamber tonight (read “the grocery store”), the checkout chick put down 3 – count them 1-2-3 $25 gift cards off the little hook there before checking me out and rang them up with MY groceries! When I asked if the lady before me had left them (thinking she got them down for her and the lady had just walked off without them) she said, “No, those were with your groceries” – Um. I’m not blind chick-o. She was trying to get herself some free groceries or gifts for somebody for Christmas!! I SAW HER pick them up and put them there! Assclown. Did she think I wouldn’t notice that the package of chicken, milk, and toilet paper was extremely expensive?
• I have to go to a baby shower this weekend and so totally do NOT want to go. Long story I won’t bore you with – but trust me – this will NOT be the social event of the year. I think I could nickname it the torture chamber.
• Aforementioned baby shower was planned “after the football season” so that everyone could come. Well whoop-de-dooo! For once, I wouldn’t have cared if it had been planned during the season – at least then I would have a viable excuse not to go. Damnit, why couldn’t football season last just a few weeks longer? Did I mention I’ve already been to a baby shower for this same chick? Yeah, I have. How easy can I get out of going to another for her? I’m open to suggestions.
• Remember October 19th – my BIRTHDAY? Yeah, that’s right – it was over a month ago. Well Yay me! I got a late present today from a dear friend at the office! Hey – better late than never. I’ll take a gift ANYTIME!
• If any of you want to send me a late bday present email me – I’ll give you shipping instructions!
• Don’t know yet where Carolina will go for the Bowl game – but who cares. Bowl tickets are bought and paid for and I will be going. Whoo hooo!

Alright, even though I’m more awake now than I was when I began typing this little number, I’m going to bed anyway. It’s before midnight too! Wow. When was the last time I went to bed THIS early….to sleep…???? hehe I must get some rest so I can function at work tomorrow otherwise I’ll be a glittering jewel of ginormous buffunery sitting at my desk attempting to work.

The Christmas Season

I’ve been thinking a lot about Christmas lately and contemplating why I’m so much more excited about the holidays this year than in recent past years.

I think I’ve uncovered the reason.

In life, circumstances surrounding us provoke us to change. We’re forced to adapt, to move into different seasons of our lives, and to change the lenses of our perception.

About five and half years ago my father passed away. At the time, the season I was living in changed in a moments notice and nothing ever seemed like it would or could become normal again. Even simple things like observing the scenery along streets and roads I’ve known my entire life were suddenly void of color. They appeared dull and uninviting and it was as if the only crayons painting my world were black and white. The colors, the laughter had all faded away.

People kept telling me that time would help mend my broken heart and ease the hurt I was experiencing over the loss of my father. At first, I chose not to believe them but as time slowly began to pass I began to see they were right. Time will never erase the hurt of not having him around, but time has begun to mend my spirit.

The first 5 Christmas’ without him just seemed so different and if I’m completely honest, I couldn’t have cared less about getting together with family because to me, my whole family wasn’t there and, well, what was the point? I realize now that I was just coping, trying to get through it. Trying to figure out what would now be “normal” for my family at Christmas.

I don’t know that I’ve figured out what “normal” Christmas is for my family without my dad but I have figured out that there is apparently something about this year that has seemed to move me into another season of my life. No, I’m not “over” losing my father and Christmas will never be like it used to be, but the glimmer of what it can be is dancing before me. And for the first time in 5 years I’m ready.

There’s no more black and white. The colors have reappeared and quite literally, the reds and greens of Christmas have filled my season.

Cheers! Here’s to you and yours and a joyous Christmas season!

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As always when I change my template, please let me know if you have any trouble reading, viewing, or commenting. I think I’ve tested everything in both Firefox and Internet Explorer and all should be fine, but you never know……

Oh, and one last thing, did I mention Carolina beat Clemson????? I did? Oh, just checking! Whooooo Hooooooooooooooooooooo!

Yeah Baby!!!!!!!!!!!

ONE OF THE BEST DAYS OF THE YEAR!

GO COCKS!!!!!

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!!!

Until Then…

What if I keep waiting for something better to come from around the corner, and nothing better ever comes? I will have waited for nothing, while in the meantime searching for everything that never would be.

I have always said I would never settle….not for the thing I want most out of this life. Sometimes I wonder if this is my coping mechanism for accepting that which my subconscious has deemed reality and yet my heart refuses to believe.

I am adamant in my belief that there is always a chance. A hope. A faith.

And so, I will continue to wait for that something.

Nicknames

Any of you have a nickname? If so, what is it and how did you get it?

I have 2 of them (that I’m willing to share here) — “Houston” – which is what they call me at work sometimes – came about when we had a major situation and I had to rush to the rescue. Now anytime something happens they come calling “Houston”. Not too original huh.

The second one is “Ritz”. Not gonna share the story of how that came about here — if you’ve ever chatted with me then maybe you know the explanation. If you’d like to guess it’s origin feel free – that might be fun to read! haha

I actually have one or two others which are just variations of my name so I’m not sharing those here.

But…I want a new one. How do we get nicknames when we want one? Usually they come about to no doing of our own — but rather some situation that provoked them. Anyway, I want a new one……..based off of what you know about me, let’s see what you can come up with…… God I’m a little scared to see what some of you type. Oh well. We’ll see.

Freaks

So, long time no post from me. It’s been chaotic in my normally utopic world lately and making time to share my thoughts in black and white just hasn’t been high on the priority list. I’m sure you all have been busy in your own grandiose worlds and haven’t missed me but you can tell me you did anyway. Go ahead, make a girl feel missed will ya?

I happen to be in Jawga for a few days. That’s Georgia to those of you North of the Mason Dixon Line. I happen to be here on business and while I’ve been here many times before on prior trips this venture certainly has offered more freakazoid happenings than I care to experience in such a short time frame.

I arrived in town Tuesday night – and I drove here in pouring down rain the entire way. Fun huh? I suppose you could call it fun if your idea of fun resembles near death. I swear, people who drive 90 miles an hour in a terrential downpour in busy traffic during rush hour in the dark when you can’t see more than 2 car lengths in front of you really annoy the hell outta me. Yeah, I know, crazy driving isn’t necessarily a “freakazoid happening” but you weren’t there. Slow the hell down! I tend to enjoy my life and would like to keep living it.

Once in town, I met up with some friends and went to dinner. As we stood at the bar waiting for our pager to vibrate ever so nicely in our pockets I must have looked like a hand appetizer to some guy passing by on his way to the other side of the bar. I only saw him when he was slightly just past me and uttered, “Excuse me, I’m sorry” with a devilish & pensive grin as he looked back over his shoulder. I didn’t reply to his apology because 1 – I was too perplexed that what had just happened had happened TO ME and 2 – business impulse kicked in and told me to keep my cool. What was he apologizing for? A full fledged open palm grab of my left ass cheek. I don’t mean a brush of the derriere or a slight feel while he brushed by – nope – it was his open palmed hand full on grabbing my ass and giving a squeeze. We were in a nice restuarant – there were 4 of us – I had just gotten out of the car from a 3 hour drive in a monsoon….I didn’t know I looked so good but apparently my ass was his first course meal.

Today, I met with someone that I knew was going to be on the opposite side of the fence with regard to the business discussion at hand. I had been warned that I didn’t want to tick this man off and that basically I just needed to accept that what I wanted I wasn’t going to get. Someone doesn’t know me too well do they? When it comes to business I can be relentless……. I met with him this afternoon. I left the meeting with EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED and he was happy as could be.
mwwahahahaahaaaa!!!!!!

Ever been anywhere and felt eyes staring a hole through you? Good. Then you know how I felt tonight. I was at dinner with some friends in a restuarant where the kitchen is somewhat open allowing for the chefs to be seen by the patrons. I kid you not, everytime I looked up from my plate the chef was staring at me. I hate for people to stare, especially when I’m stuffing my face. Well if you knew me you’d know that I don’t look away from people who stare. My typical response is to stare back – like a showdown of sorts. When it happens with someone I’m attracted to the end result is quite nice, however, when it happens and leaves me feeling all grimmey its somewhat eerie and freaky. What the hell was he staring at?????? I can only imagine I must have been looking pretty hot tonight! ha!

Moving right along, there’s a “new” store here that I’ve never noticed before. But hell, you can’t miss it now – it’s lit up like a Christmas tree on steroids in purple and pink neon. My sidekick and I decided to venture into this wonderland and see what it was all about. Yes. That was a weak attempt to make you think we didn’t know what was inside. Let’s just say it was Disneyland for Adults only. After finding just the ride in this amusement park I patiently waiting around on my friend when all of a sudden some freaky, weird, make me shiver with grossness dude excused himself past me. As he is directy in front of me he scans me from head to toe, says, “You are beautiful”, walks about 3 feet past me, stops and looks back and grunts. Yeah, attaway big guy. Whatever. He gave me the heebeegeebeeies and I quickly moved to another part of the store. My ultrasensitive sensors were up and damn if this assclown wasn’t following me around the store. Freak. There happened to be a security guard in the store and he quickly moved in…..I felt better…..until the fucktard left and made it a point to pass me and tell me he hoped I had a fantastic evening and then watched me as he walked all the way to the door. ICK! ICK! ICK! I had the security guard see us to the car when we left.

I could probably share more happenings but it’s late, I have to be up at the buttcrack of dawn and I’m tired of typing. I’m sure you’re tired of reading this hodgepodge anyway so I’m off to the sheets for some um..sleep. Yeah, that’s it.

Goodnight people….Have a great Thursday. I’m going to try – I mean, how many freaks can be in one town? Oh yeah, I’m in Jawga..let’s not try to answer that one…..
(Love you Georgians, mean it! hehe)